Jesus made clear to Nicodemus that being safe in God's grace (Filled with his goodness, lost in his love, as hymn-writer Fanny Crosby so beautifully put it) has nothing to do with birthright, ethnic derivation, human attainments--it is all God's work, and his alone. In fact, it is as it has always been with God's people from the earliest passages of the Old Testament: God made a covenant, took all the initiative in doing so, was constantly faithful in keeping it, and made it clear that the covenantal people had two choices: stay in or opt out. But there was nothing that could make God opt out. St. Paul said confidently, Nothing can separate us from the love of God.
[A study of Old Testament covenants would be useful here. I'll leave this to your research.]
The Israelites of the Old Testament, and the Jews of the New, had made the mistake of thinking that God's love and providential care applied only to them. Rather than seeing their status as God's people as a means to God's end (see Galatians chap. 3, especially verses 8-9: Scripture foresaw that God would justify the Gentiles by faith, and announced the gospel in advance to Abraham: “All nations will be blessed through you.” So those who rely on faith are blessed along with Abraham, the man of faith.), they somehow concluded that they deserved that special status as theirs and theirs alone, and that there was nothing more to be discussed (see my last post regarding complacency and Jesus' rather decisive negation of that notion).
Being born from above is what God does in addressing the gap ("the great gulf fixed" of Luke 16) between God's glorious being and standards, and our human condition. Were it not for God's mending of our tattered spirits, we would be left completely to our own devices--not a good place to be.
Becoming a Christian is a whole other matter. We aren't born Christians, but rather as members of God's kingdom. Christianity is a religion, a belief system. It requires a conscious choice in my view (my baptismal regeneration and Calvinist friends' beliefs to the contrary notwithstanding). It's a choice that I have made. I have posted elsewhere that Christianity (for all the unfortunate baggage associated with that name) is the clearest expression of God's nature, will, and ways that we have. I would press my faith upon anyone. There's no better way to understand and to appreciate God, learn how and what to do right, and to protect oneself from "opting out" than to become a follower of Christ. It is a privilege without parallel. But it's not the same as being born again.
Now if I can just figure out who the elect are!
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